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Why You Gotta Keep Saying The D Word? | {THE AND} V & Asha

Why You Gotta Keep Saying The D Word? | {THE AND} V & Asha

In This Video

V (she/her) & Asha (she/her) have been best friends for 12 years, they've both learned many significant and life changing lessons from each other, they have overcome adversity together and have gotten to know one another very well in the midst of it. There's plenty of love, patience and communication involved in their relationship and those are the things that have gotten their connection to get so deep, supportive and long lasting.

V and Asha's journey through friendship is a testament to the power of shared experiences. Over the course of their 12-year companionship, they have not only forged an unbreakable bond but have also become each other's pillars of strength. Their friendship is a living embodiment of resilience, a journey marked by triumphs over adversity. Through life's ups and downs, they have stood side by side, unwavering in their support for one another. The depth of their connection is a result of the love, patience, and open communication they have consistently invested in their relationship. Their story serves as a reminder that true friendship is a remarkable blend of empathy, understanding, and the willingness to embark on life's unpredictable journey together.

In inviting us to share in their emotional space of connection, V and Asha inspire us to reflect on the profound wisdom that stems from shared human experiences. Their narrative encourages us to look beyond the surface and dive into the profound lessons that these experiences can teach us. This project is a tribute to the beauty of vulnerability, a celebration of those who have bared their souls and extended a piece of their journey to us. As we bear witness to their story, we are reminded of the universal threads that weave us all together - the desire for meaningful connections, the resilience to overcome challenges, and the transformative power of friendship. To all those who have embraced this project with openness and candor, we extend our heartfelt gratitude. May their stories kindle a spark of connection in all who encounter them, fostering a deeper appreciation for the intricate tapestry of the human experience.

As we explore new perspectives we invite you to step into the emotional space of connection and experience the deeper lessons that shared experiences can afford humanity. To everyone who has participated openly and vulnerably in our project - we appreciate what you have shared with us and hope others do as well.

 

Transcript

You know, what spring break I'm talking about.
Burger King.
That's the...
Tattoo spot.
Now. I would definitely, that brings up back.
Okay.
That one.
Okay.
All right.
Describe the first moment you realized
you could fully trust me.
Oh...
That's cute.
Um.
It was one of these spring breaks you came back.
Okay. To Miami into the house.
So when I had first moved into the house,
you lived in Baltimore, and then you came back
Just for a visit, a little visit.
That was Burger King.
We saw...
No.
Yeah, I'm telling you, that was -
Because I just keep thinking about, uh,
Trick Daddy.
Yeah,
Like, seeing Trick Daddy at - we went to Trick Daddy.
But, - That´s when...
Yeah, a lot happened.
A lot of that happened on that that visit
and I feel like that's when
we realized that
Yeah.
that's my, that's my homie.
That's my homie. - Yeah.
Yeah, I feel like you told me, you opened up
I feel like for the first time for real,
about what you were going through
living in Baltimore.
I think that's the, um,
Mmm.
I said it was going to be you. Right?
I told you. - Don´t make me cry.
I told you.
Um.
That's when my grandad.
Yeah. Mm.
Yeah, I take that.
You got it.
You are the boss.
What do you think I'm hesitant to ask you?
Um,
now?
What are you hesitant to ask...?
What do you think I'm hesitant to ask you?
Baby, I'm not sharing that.
I think I probably told you, but
I still think you would want to know.
That I'm hesitant to ask you? - Mm-hmm
Now I want to know because I was goint to say nothing.
Um,
It's okay.
Uh...
Am I okay?
I'm never hesitant to ask if you're okay.
Like, for real.
I'm not.
I'm not, no.
For real.
No, I feel like at this point,
especially after our last heart to heart,
And us, like, sobbing on the phone.
I feel like I could ask you anything and I can almost
I can tell usually when you are,
Right.
But I can tell usually when you are
really overwhelmed, or kind of in your feelings,
like,
No, like, I'm not going to talk about it, but
I mean, like deeply, like,
like I know what you show to the world.
I know your front facing, you know?
It's like “V, I get it.”
But like, for real?
You know,
because of this. - No...
You know, there just be like, time for that.
There just be time for that.
All right, we going.
We going, we going.
What are you hesitant to ask me?
I can't.
I can't.
Really?
Oh, thanks. - You see?
I told you it was going to be her first, I'm,
I'm a G, y'all!
Listen.
I know it was going to be one.
Y'all not about to hand me out.
Know what I mean?
Um. - All right.
Okay.
What do you think I'm hesitant to ask you?
You're going to say nothing so.
Well,
“Now that you bring it up”
I was not hesitant to ask you nothing, but
I feel like you're hesitant to ask me if I'm really okay.
No.
because you know, I'm just going to - it out.
You want to be me so bad.
You want to be me so bad.
No, we are each other.
But. - I'm not you.
That wouldn't be it.
I don't think I'm hesitant to,
All right, next.
Cause this is about to be it.
It's your turn.
I'm not, I'm not, I'm not.
I want to say it.
Looking back on our years together,
is there anything you regret or wish
you could take back?
I wish I would have stayed
and finished the lease.
You know what's crazy?
I knew you were going to say that
Girl.
I wish I would've stayed and finish the lease.
Life changing.
I can't even fathom what my life would be like right now
If I would have stayed for, f-
four extra months?
Honestly,
we could have, we had, we were like, figuring it out.
we were going to get an apartment and we were going to be like,
Boop! You are here,
I'm there, but we're not far.
And it's like,
“Cause I want to decorate the way I want to decorate”
“this, this leather couch, It's not me!”
You remember that?
Do you remember that conversation?
It sounds like a conversation we would have,
cause I wasn't feeling that couch.
And we were talking about how we never lived on our own.
We didn't.
And we out of college now, and it was like
okay...
I wish you wouldn't have left, for sure.
but I think you needed to.
I did. - Yeah.
I wish that when you left, everything would've happened
the way you wanted it to tho, so that,
Um, you know.
you're not.
you're not.
What was the...?
What was our biggest challenge together,
and how did we overcome it?
You leaving.
Yeah, I think so too.
That was like,
I was like, “Well, yeah, that's the end of our friendship.”
“We're done.”
And,
I don't know,
I think we overcame it,
you know,
I'm just very understanding.
You know?
Oh my God.
No, but,
For me,
it was meeting your partner,
and the stuff he said to me.
Well, hell. That may have been what the... Nice.
We were, like, in the studio, he was like, “Yeah, dadada.”
And everything he was saying, I was like,
“Man, I miss my doll.”
And he was like,
That's Lil Wayne, by the way.
You hate that - I do hate Lil Wayne.
And I was like,
I was like, all right, well, you know,
maybe things didn't go how we wanted it.
It is what it is. Life happens.
Shit happens.
I forgive her!
Whatevs!
Oh, wait.
Reverse. - Reverse, reverse.
A big obstacle?
One of my biggest obstacles was us
as cohabitating.
Living together. - In the same home?
Yeah.
Oh my gosh, it was terrible for me.
Oh, f***!
I literally thought I stayed out the way.
Man, it was little stuff.
It was little stuff, it was little stuff.
It was, - It was little stuff.
It was it was makeup.
It was,
Girl...
And look at you today.
Girl, you should thank me!
It was makeup, it was,
it was mostly makeup.
Wait, what?!
It was it was music being played
in the morning.
Because I like
I'm telling you, it's just a bunch of really stupid,
petty stuff.
First of all,
I think I was really sick of you.
Yeah.
I think time apart.
Time apart is, uh.
That's all that was needed.
And girl, I'm the best roommate.
Sure.
Your turn.
Girl, I ain't saying nothing else nice about you.
what's the pain in me you wish you could-
I knew,
I knew. I knew, I knew.
I would remove all of the guilt that you feel
- Okay! from people's deaths.
Okay.
Why you got to keep saying the D word.
I'm sorry, I would take it.
Because it's a real thing and it's,
like you can't be scared of it, and I get it,
that it's scary and it's really overwhelming.
And it happens a lot.
And you feel like you have a part in it, but you don't.
And it just sucks.
It just sucks. That's it. - Yeah.
When do you worry for me the most and why?
Um.
Probably like, now, like, you know, like now.
Not like now.
Like, like, like in life now.
Since, like, everything separation and all that stuff.
Because you're by yourself.
Like I've been by myself, but not with two kids.
You know what I'm saying, like
trying to navigate a new world by yourself.
Now,
two kids,
you know,
lost hope.
You know what I'm saying, like I thought, you know,
with all the coulda, woulda, shouldas, but it wasn't.
That's why I call you every day.
All day.
Thanks, friend.
I appreciate it.
Shout out to you.
Yeah, no, if there's ever been a time,
it's now, it's now.
Reverse, reverse.
When do I worry about you the most?
When people die.
Oh, shit.
Okay, next
Your turn. - We're not goint to do this
What do you think life is teaching me right now?
And what advice do you have for me regarding it?
Oh, she shakes.
I feel like one thing is that
it's always your time.
It's always your time.
I feel like it is always your time.
It is never, Oh, I'm not this enough.
Oh, I'm too old now. Like I feel like it's always,
You really think I still think like that?
No, I don't think you always think that.
But I feel like you have now realized also,
Okay. - that it is always your time
Yeah.
You just gotta claim that shit.
Like, hoop! It's mine.
Stop being scared.
That's it!
To dim my light.
That's it! - Shine around people
Like, it is, - Yeah, it's weird.
There are things that you are really good at,
And you got to do it.
Do the stuff.
That's it.
What have you learned from me that I may not be fully aware of?
You know.
Everything.
Everything?
Yeah.
Okay.
Reverse, no? - Reverse?
What do you learn from me?
What I learned from you?
I feel like I really started to explore my style.
Being your friend. I really like.
That's what it is. I feel like I
learned to get more comfortable in my femininity,
with you.
Shout out to us.
Oh, you're right handed.
Very right handed.
Yeah. Okay. - All right.
Last one, - Last questions, last questions.
How does this friendship feel like?
How does this friendship feel like?
Yeah.
That you're the homie like,
you're like my sister homie.
You're like my big sis.
Yeah, I ain't got no younger siblings.
I am the youngest.
So I think that's why I'd be like, so patient with you.
Cause I'd be like,
if I, first of all, I got one sister.
She patient
not really with nobody else,
Just you.
She gets me.
What in our relationship
are you most grateful for?
Um.
Man,
the top one, I'd say,
is communication.
Yeah.
Like, you know, I don't talk to many people,
but when I talk, like, the fact that you can talk back
or, you know, offer advice and stuff.
Yeah. - Yeah.
Communication.
I feel like I can spill all the beans without judgment.
Yeah, you can kind of see the big picture.
Yeah. Mm.
Bingo!
Hey there.
Thanks so much for watching.
If you enjoyed that conversation
and want to ask these questions to your own friends,
check out {The And} Friends Edition card game
that you can find at theskindeep.com/shop
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